Editor's note: Please forgive any changes I've had to make to appease the censors. I have created a new blog that I hope will be less offensive. You can see it here. I would like to wrap up the Roman Road salvation segment, so here goes:

     idiot: Well, it's been a short, but very eventful ride. Let's cut to the chase. For the sake of argument, I'll agree with everything you've said about me being a sinner, and needing Christ's redemption to get to heaven.

     RR: I'm glad you've finally come to your senses.

     idiot: So, what's next?

     RR: Now comes the most important decision you'll ever have to make. Do you want Jesus to save you?

     idiot: What must I do to be saved?

     RR: Pray this prayer: Lord Jesus, I confess I am a sinner. I now repent from all my sins. Please come into my heart, and be Lord of my life. Thank you, Jesus.

     idiot: That's it?

     RR: That's it!

     idiot: What about going to church, tithing, getting baptized, and all that stuff?

     RR: All that "stuff" is important, yes. But if you were to die tonight without saying that prayer, you would not go to heaven.

     idiot: And all I need to do, to get to heaven, is pray that prayer?

     RR: As long as you truly mean it, yes!

     idiot: Wait a minute, you're telling me if Hitler prayed that prayer, he'd be in heaven?

     RR: God's mercy shows no bounds.

     idiot: Well, what about this: If Mother Theresa never prayed that prayer, she's NOT in heaven?

     RR: No, remember, we are ALL sinners.

     idiot: That's CRAZY! Anyone who goes through your little initiation gets a ticket to paradise, and EVERYONE else goes to HELL?

     RR: Hey, don't shoot the messenger!

     idiot: Well, I don't like the MESSAGE! What kind of God, what kind of justice...hhh

     RR: WHAT KIND OF GOD? I'LL TELL YOU WHAT KIND OF GOD, HE'S A GOD OF MERCY! DON'T FORGET, WE ALL DESERVE TO GO TO HELL, IT'S ONLY THROUGH HIS INFINITE MERCY THAT HE SACRIFICED HIS OWN SON SO ANY ONE AT ALL EVEN HAS A CHANCE TO ESCAPE THAT JUDGEMENT!

     idiot: You almost had me. I was THIS CLOSE to joining your little club, now, I'l have to get back to you.

     RR: This isn't about ME, it's about YOU! Don't you understand that without saying that prayer, you're dooming YOURSELF?

     announcer: I'm sorry, we're out of time. 

    

It seems as though "Free Speech" is dead in America. This blog has been removed from several search engines. Apparently, I have offended someone; for that, I am sorry. My final thought for you, then, is this: What do Muslims, Jews, and Christians all have in common? We are all Sons Of Abraham.

Because our dialogue about the Roman Road got so contentious, me, {idiot}, and my friend from the Religious Right, {RR}, decided to switch gears, and bring up the issue of gay marriage, we will conclude the Roman Road shortly:

idiot: With the elections getting closer, there are other issues besides the conflicts in Iraq and Israel. Can you give us your take on gay marriage?

RR: Be glad to. We need to pass legislation that defines marriage as a union between a man and a woman.

idiot: Why?

RR: Because homosexual relations is a sin. That's clearly what the Bible says.

idiot: A lot of people would say you're just condemning people whose lifestyle you don't agree with.

RR: I understand the small minority of people who don't accept our view, but this is a moral imperative. It's absolutely vital that our nation return to traditional family values.

idiot: When you talk about a "moral imperative", aren't you just reacting to certain legislation on the state level? One problem I have about this, is states have always decided their own laws concerning marriage. Different ages of consent, some have different laws about cousins, that sort of thing.

RR: This is not a state issue, it is national. For instance, if two guys get married in Mass., I don't want my tax dollars giving them the same status for national things, like tax deductions, Medicare, and the like.

idiot: So, now you're saying it's an economic issue?

RR: No, not at all! I'm saying gay marriage doesn't just affect Mass., it affects the whole country. More than anything else, it's a MORAL issue.

idiot: But aren't you still discriminating against people just because of their lifestyle?

RR: Would you be discriminating if your neighbors turned out to be cannibals? Isn't that just their "lifestyle?"

idiot: That analogy is just stupid. Whatever a gay couple does is just between themselves. Cannibals? Isn't that just a little over the top?

RR: Just trying to make a point. The bottom line is, homosexuality is a sin. That's not my view, it's all throughout the Bible. From the writings of Paul, all the way back to Moses and the laws.

idiot: So, Moses didn't like homosexuality, and everyone else followed his lead?

RR: NO, NOT AT ALL! Moses received the law directly from God. Everything written in the Bible, from Genesis to Revelation, is God's word. Besides, homosexuality was a sin long before Moses' time.

idiot: How's that?

RR: Haven't you ever heard of the story of Lot? He lived in Sodom, That's where we get the word, "sodomy" from. When the sinful mob from Sodom came to Lot's house and demanded Lot to bring out the two messengers, so they could have sex with them, Lot offered his two virgin daughters instead. THAT'S how much of an abomination homosexuality is.

idiot: WHAT? A father was gonna give an angry crowd HIS OWN DAUGHTERS TO BE RAPED?

RR: Calm down, it didn't happen. The messengers persuaded Lot not to let his daughters go out. God protected Lot's house, and no one got hurt.

idiot: I'm sorry, I just can't get passed that. No way, no matter what, would I ever let my daughters get raped, let alone OFFER THEM UP!

RR: Can't you see, that's how horrendously evil homosexuality is to God?

idiot: You talk about traditional family values. If I had to choose between my daughters getting raped, or having a gay couple live next door...no contest.

RR: You're missing the point entirely. If you just take off your rose colored glasses for a minute, you'd see. The way you reacted to the daughters getting raped? That's how outraged God reacts to homosexuality.

idiot: That's just plain stupid. You can't possibly compare...I just can't possibly compare...I would never, ever, WANT my own daughters to get raped.

RR: You've made my point. We are ALL God's children. He doesn't want ANYONE abused, sexually, or otherwise.

idiot: I'm starting to not like your God very much. What happened to the God of love, and forgiveness?

RR: God IS Love. But you're forgetting that God is also Holy. And sin, ANY sin, only keeps us away from Him.

Commercial break.

Back for round two of the discussion between me, {idiot}, and my friend from the Religious Right, {RR}, on the salvation plan from the Book of Romans: idiot: Well, the first part of this discussion didn't go so well. What's next? RR: Next is Romans 5:8, which says: "But God demonstrates His love toward us, in that, while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." idiot: That sounds a little more encouraging. Last time you said I was going to hell because I was born that way. RR: By "that way", I meant born in sin. idiot: Yeah, I got that. Now you're saying Christ died for me. RR: Yes. idiot: I know about the crucifixion thing, but what does that have to do with me? I wasn't around when that happened. RR: It has everything to do with you. Jesus paid the price for your sins on the cross. idiot: Great! So, I'm not going to hell after all. RR: God opened a door, so that you have a chance to escape the punishment you deserve. idiot: I DESERVE? WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE BURNING IN FIRE FOR EVER AND EVER? RR: Hey, calm down...You're the one who's supposed to be objective, remember? idiot: hhh...okay. But, you're telling me I'm going to hell, just for being born. Then you say, God threw in an escape clause, by having Jesus die for my sins. What if I never sinned? I never asked Jesus to die, ya gonna blame me for that too? RR: I'm not "blaming" anyone. I'm just telling you what the Bible says. And the Bible says, "All have sinned." idiot: All...So, I guess that means you, too. RR: Yep, me too. That's why I'm so thankful that God gave His Son to die for MY sins, too. Commercial break.

Getting back to our regular schedule, me, {idiot}, and my friend from the Religious Right, {RR}, will take up a discussion that I chose, for a change:

idiot: I've heard a lot about a road in Rome that Christians walk on, to get to heaven.

RR: What are you talking about?

idiot: I don't know, exactly, all I know is there's a Roman Road-

RR: Oh, you mean THE Roman Road. It's a way of showing the way to Salvation.

idiot: You lost me.

RR: In the Book of Romans, God reveals the simple truths about how to be Born Again.

idiot: Well, that's what I'm lookin' for! How's it go?

RR: Okay, it starts with Romans 3:23, which says, "For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God."

idiot: That's about as clear as mud.

RR: It means we all have sin in our hearts. We all were born with sin. We were born under the power of sin's control.

idiot: So, I'm going to hell, because I was BORN that way?

RR: It's a little more complicated than that, but, essentially, yes.

idiot: Your God doesn't come across as being fair.

RR: Who are we to judge God? And how can you even use man's definition of "fair", when talking about an Almighty God?

idiot: I thought this was supposed to be a happy, "feel good" kind of a thing.

RR: In the end, it sure is.

Commercial break.